New Year's Resolution

So I guess I must make my New Year's Resolution to actually do my blog more than once a year! Let's see how I go with that :) So we now have a four year old. We had a wonderful weekend away in Cairns, specifically to do the Kuranda scenic railway and the skyrail. Callum loves trains - are they his obsession? I don't know, he doesn't know every type of train built, but he can tell you that they carry coal, oil, boxes and mail (he read that in a book) and that there are diesels and steam trains. He has been watching model trains on youtube - in particular the Hamburg exhibition (which makes his aprents happy as we actually have that on our list of places we must visit). He has also been watching LEGO trains, which is what he asked Santa for. (Santa delivered) The experience was wonderful for Callum. He loved the whole thing - he excitedly yelled to the train as it arrived at the station, much to the amusement of everyone gathered, Hello Kuranda train, How are you today? Are you happy? It's the beautiful Kuranda train. He bounced all over the seating, the family seated with us didn't seem to mind as they had 2 young children. They didn't seem to mind Callum constantly reminding them that they were on the Kuranda train either. Nor when he pointed out that he was wearing a Lightning McQueen shirt. According to the book, Callum isn't supposed to interact with strangers, he is supposed to be in his own little world and not recognise that other people are a part of it. But then we get told, Callum is at the other end of the spectrum and interacts too much with strangers, just like he is too affectionate with kisses and hugs to the important people in his life. He had one public meltdown while out shopping. At the DFO in Rivers. We were at the checkout finalising our purchase and Callum was just outside the door playing and talking about the Christmas decorations. We went to walk out and join him and that's when it started. He hadn't finished shopping, he had missed the payment and wanted to go through the chekout again. He ran off into the store and I caught up with him in the women's shoe department. He snatched a pair of ladies shoes and said this is what he was buying. I tried to talk to him, telling him they weren't my size and I didn't like the style (all true), but no, he was adamant, this was his purchase. His father then tried to tell him the same reasons, all the while Callum is crying and trying to put together what it is he wants/needs to do. I didn't hear anyone say anything (unlike the great grocery shopping meltdown where the old lady marched up to Callum and told him he was a very naughty boy) but I could feel the stares. His father was down on his level calmly talking to him, cuddling him, reassuring him - I could imagine what they were thinking - what a naughty child, a spoilt brat. Then we were able to convince him that he could by a pair of socks for himself as the shoes were no good for Mum or him, to which he agreed and meltdown finished. He happily lined up waiting his turn to pay. Again, I didn't hear anything but I'm sure they were thinking what a spoilt brat, gets his own way, parents are creating a monster. What triggered the meltdown was missing out on paying for the goods we had bought. Once we were able to establish that, verbal skills go out the window when he gets very upset, we were able to offer him a solution that he could process that would fix it for him. Seriously for $1.80 for the socks I wasn't overly worried. He paid his money, took his change and receipt and you wouldn't know that anything was wrong 2 mins ago. My husband is great - he doesn't worry about what anyone thinks, his focus is just on his son. I on the other hand, worry a lot about what other people think, in particular about my son and about my skills as a mother. I wanted to explain that it is a processing problem - he had missed the step in shopping where you pay for your items, and he had to go back to that step. Once he was able to do that he was fine. I was thinking everyone was judging us and thinking that I should have just dragged him out screaming, I wanted to explain that wouldn't help and would make the meltdown last longer. I say we have to pick our battles and this one was easily solved with a sock purchase. Perhaps I am creating a monster, but he was so calm afterwards and we had a fabulous rest of the day. I think it lets him know that we will take the time to help him work out what is upsetting him so much and do what we can to support him.